The love teenagers share for social networking sites is no secret.Everyone loves to hate Orkut and Facebook.Now,calls for banning them are being made.I've decided that we all are far too addicted to Facebook to let it be banned.Rather,It would be much better just to crib and rant about it.
Reasons I hate Facebook for:
1.Quizzes:
If there would ever be a reason why the owners of Facebook would have to bow before God and pay for their sins,paving their way into Inferno,it would be the ever so irritating quizzes.To call them only mindless and absolute nonsense would be considered their appraisal.For both the takers as well as the makers,I see no reason to indulge in these quizzes.Takers can for once be spared a thought as we people often(very often)have nothing to do,but don't the makers have a life.I believe that these guys were only born with half a brain and that too removed by extensive surgery,attended schools in Bangladesh and thereafte,read Paris Hilton lyrics and watched Scary Movie to improve upon their intelligence.Everytime you take a quiz,one of your brain cells is extinguished forever.
Some of the most typical facebook quizzes, which are also some of the worst, are as follows:
* What are your chances with Megan Fox? (it always gives a 100% result,Damn It)
* What are the initials of the person who truly loves you? (Usually something impossible like Q. Z.)
* How tall are you going to be? (It tells five footers that they're going to be 6'4" tall, thereby making them very happy.)
* What should your parents have truly named you? (My parents should have named me Xavier Milito.)
* When will you get pregnant? (it tells males that they will get pregnant the next year, strangely.)
2.Tagging
Why this sucks: The first time you are tagged, you might feel a mild interest in knowing that you are 'the sexy one' or 'the drunk one' or 'the handsome one'. However (besides being false), these tags lose their charm after you have been tagged every possible thing in 50 pictures every day. And the pictures get worse and worse - there have been pictures with 20 squares of different colors, and people have been tagged as one square or the other, with no explanation or logic whatsoever. This happens to an extent where you open the 'photos' section of someone you're interested in, and are flabbergasted to see boring tagged pictures instead of a beautiful face.
3.Friend Requests and Profile viewing:
This is dedicated to one of my very special friends and the joy I get reading her Orkut Scraps.The Ohh so immortal Orkut phrase-"I want to frandship with you","Hey beautiful,we can hit it off well.I am very frandly by nature and have all good habbits","Hey!dint relly knw much abt u (in ord wrds xcatly nthin) bt yeah hav herd alot frm ___.Can we be frands"and the like.Facebook with its friend requests being just requests and restricted profile viewing deprives me of the joys of snooping around and checking out beautifuk chicks.
4.Mafia Wars/Farmville :
Mafia Wars is the single most useless pastime known to mankind. For the uninitiated, it is a game on facebook in which you recruit a Mafia (made up of other facebook members), and do various 'jobs' (all by mouse clicks), and you earn points, and level up. That's it - there is no ultimate goal or anything.
It would be OK if facebook just let players of Mafia Wars play by themselves; after all, everyone should have the freedom to do whatever they want. But no, they must thrust it down our throats - half the posts on our wall announce that A has declared war on B, please help him and the other half ask us to please donate an item like a Monkey Statue or Plastic Dagger to person C.
Mafia Wars is closely matched in annoyingness and pointlessness by Farmville, where you - you guessed it - play a farmer and rescue 'lonely little cows' which 'wander into your farm,and also grow rotten tomatoes and stuff.Oh dear!' The only reason why Farmville is not worse than Mafia Wars is because less people play it.
However, both these pointless games serve as a warning - that people are so jobless that they'll keep clicking a mouse with no ultimate aim. Maybe Mafia Wars is a reflection of life itself - which for most people is a collection of tasks with no ultimate aim.
5.STATUS MESSAGES:
Need I say more???????????/
What will happen after a few more years of facebook domination?
1. Everyone on facebook will become totally brainless, and babies will be the most intelligent beings on earth.
2. Facebook quizzes will be the preferred method of evaluation of children in schools, and facebook quizzes like 'What type of student are you?' will be used for admission into universities. For job interviews, more difficult quizzes like 'What colour is your aura?' will be used to differentiate the great from the useless.
3. People will not know who their real father, mother, brother or uncle is, but they will be immediately able to tell you which of their facebook friends is their 'Father of the Day' or 'Uncle of the Day'.
4. Posts like this will be the only ones on humor sites, because no one else will even understand any other forms of jokes.
5. Nobody will talk to each other unless they're friends on facebook first, and even then they will only chat.
Alternatives to facebook:
1. A life.
2. Rehab.
3. Joining the (real) Mafia and kicking some (real) ass.
4. Becoming a farmer and dying of boredom.
5. Getting into a relationship instead of lying about a non-existent one on facebook.
This concludes my feelings about Facebook.However,I'll still be taking quizzes,playing Mafia wars(Not farmville-rotten tomatoes and infested cabbages..Yuckk)and whiling away my ever so inexhaustible time.Happy Orkutting,Happy Facebooking and Happy TIME WASTING.
Cheers.....
